Live in Harmony with Your Values

"For what [has] a man profited if he shall gain the whole world but lose his soul?" (Mark 8:36)

Brian Tracy says:  "Any attempt to live on the outside in a manner that contradicts the values you hold on the inside will cause you stress, negativity, unhappiness, pessimism, and even anger and frustration."   You must clarify your values before you set out to achieve your goals.  Think of yourself as a mountaineer setting out to climb a mountain.  First, you must collect your array of tools that you must take with you in order to make the summit.  If you go without these tools, you will not make it very far up the mountain.  Similarly, if you don't identify your values, you will not make it very far in your conquest of your goals.

The Bible says:  "For what [has] a man profited if he shall gain the whole world but lose his soul?" (Mark 8:36)  The happiest people are those living in harmony with their beliefs and values; the unhappiest people are those who live in discord with their beliefs and values.  No amount of pills or alcohol or food can make it all right if you are living a lie.  "Your goals must be congruent with your values and your values must be congruent with your goals." 

"You demonstrate your values in your actions, especially your actions under pressure," explains Brian Tracy.  One of my favourite movies, Leap Year, demonstrates this truth.  Amy Adams plays a woman who is torn between two men, an American and an Irishman.  The former, played by Adam Scott, is a successful cardiologist who lives in a beautiful condo in Boston.  The latter, played by Matthew Goode, is a down on his luck tavern owner from Dublin.  On a trip to Ireland, the American finally proposes to Amy.  She returns to Boston to live in the condo with her fiance.  However, shortly after, the fire alarm goes off and Amy's fiance is scrambling to find his laptop.  He doesn't even make sure that Amy is safe.  The cardiologist's actions under pressure reveal his true values.  Amy has her answer and takes the first flight back to Ireland where she gets a proposal from the Irishman (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1216492/).

Mark 8:36 courtesy https://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Mark-8-36/. 

Let Go, Surrender, Taste Freedom

"Abandon the idea that you will forever be the victim of the things that have happened to you.  Choose to be a victor." (Seth Adam Smith)

Two years ago, we took our two kids to Disney World and had the pleasure of watching a live production of Frozen.  While the Thomas and Jacqueline had already watched it in the theatre with friends, it was the first time that Rob and I had seen it.  We were enamored with the song "Let It Go". I had been hurt by someone and was having a hard time letting it go.  "Let It Go" became my mantra for the year 2015.  With Elsa on my Vision Board and with God at my side, I was liberated!

Brian Tracy recommends that if you want to be happy in life, you have to stop the blame game.  Blame requires negative emotions; it will drag you down.  Just one negative emotion can sabotage your happiness.  That's not to say that your anger is not legitimate, that you have no reason to be unhappy.  I had a good reason to feel betrayed.  However, if I had continued to feel sorry for myself, I would have hurt no one but me.  One day it hit me like a ton of bricks:  It's not my job to judge her, it's God's job.  I was able to forgive her.  A gigantic burden was lifted off my shoulders.

As Seth Adam Smith advises:  "Abandon the idea that you will forever be the victim of the things that have happened to you.  Choose to be a victor."  You can't control everything that happens to you. You will run up against obstacles, against injustice, against evil.  But you can control your reaction to it.  Say to yourself:  "I am responsible for my own happiness."  Don't let anything stand in the way of your goals.  Let it go.  

Note:  Read The Secret of Letting Go by Guy Finley at https://www.amazon.com/Secret-Letting-Go-Guy-Finley/dp/0738711985.

http://realrawtruths.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Let-Go-Sunflower.jpeg

Curiosity Killed the Cat -- Not!

"I have no special talent.  I am only passionately curious." (Albert Einstein)

I always thought that curiosity was a frivolity.  Cats are curious.  Monkeys are curious (at least Curious George).  But are people naturally curious?  According to blogger Todd Kashdan, one of the keys to happiness is cultivating and exercising our innate sense of curiosity.   Being curious can transform everyday tasks into enjoyable experiences.  Curiosity can help us recognize pleasures in novel experiences and find novelty in familiar experiences.  It can make us feel alive, engaged and more capable of embracing opportunities, thereby helping us to achieve our goals.

A 1996 study of adults aged 60 to 86 conducted by the journal "Psychology and Aging" concluded that the study subjects who were more curious were more likely to be alive five years later when a follow up study was conducted.  A 2005 "Health Psychology" study concluded that subjects who were more curious were less likely to have diabetes or hypertension.  A third study, conducted on children, linked curiousity to a higher IQ.  Three year olds who were curious scored on average 12 points higher on an IQ test conducted eight years later.    

Couples who run into marital troubles often complain about being bored with their spouse.  Curious people are less likely to get bored with their partner thereby enriching their relationship.  Rather than searching for happiness outside their marriage, they try to see the novelty in the familiar.

Curiosity serves as an entry point to a job, a hobby or a passion.  If you are passionate about something, you're usually curious.  Building your knowledge about a topic helps you to be more curious.  For instance, a marine biologist is more likely to notice a special pattern on a fish since he has a well rounded knowledge of marine life.  A child who knows 45 states will be more curious to know the other five.  A piano students is more likely to hear the nuances of a concerto.

The National Public Radio aired a story about a potato chip factory employee who employed his innate sense of curiosity.  His job was to make sure that all of the potato chips which rolled by on the conveyor belt were uniform in size and pleasing to the eye -- a tedious task at the best of times.  However, he made up a game by giving names to the misshapen chips and starting a collection which included Marily Monroe, Elvis and Jimi Hendrix.  The factory worker's day started to move more quickly and he became more efficient at spotting the misshapen chips.  

In order to cultivate your curiosity seek out new experiences which sometimes requires a suspension of judgement on your part.  An 18 year old bodybuilder was asked to learn how to crochet, a hobby that he had previously seen as a waste of time.  After learning how, though, he discovered that crocheting was demanding, meditative and that he could make a flip flop sandal.  He was surprised to find out that he actually liked crocheting.  It reminds me of the Dr. Seuss character who, after resisting eating something new for the whole book, tries it and announces "I do like green eggs and ham!" 

Follow the example of the cat and monkey.  Be curious and reap the rewards!

Source:  https://experiencelife.com/article/the-power-of-curiosity/.

Fore more information, read Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert (2006).